Let us dissect this "clever" turn of phrase.
If we are to assume that this is actually true, that we need 680 News NOW more than EVER, then this implies that at any given moment, our need for 680 News is greater than at any other time in the past. That is, our need for 680 News (call this β), is a non-decreasing function of time, t. To illustrate:
So eventually, our need for 680 News will reach infinity, and we will all become helplessly glued to the radio.
(If this post seemed kind of crazy, I am just trying to demonstrate how we use certain expressions and phrases that don't really make sense if you think about it. This kind of thing is especially prevalent in marketing; working in the tech industry, I've seen plenty of impressive-sounding, but empty, doublespeak to promote products. Perhaps a topic for a future post.)
God... I hate 680 News. They're stories are so condensed that they might as well not even bother.
ReplyDelete"680 News Time six o'clock"
*BEEP*
"Three hundred dead in plane crash, now the weather, here's Harold Hussein."
"RAIN."
*Commercial*
"Now time for the 680 news traffic watch, here's Darrel Dahlmer."
"Finch401Mississauga403QEW."
Seriously... I don't think I've ever gotten any useful traffic information from 680. When they actually DO report any traffic, it usually happened hours ago, and always seems to involve a broken water main in some sort of sparsely populated residential neighbourhood. Meanwhile, I'm sitting in a catastrophic traffic jam caused by a 50 car pileup right smack in the middle of the city, and they somehow have yet to clue into it.
Sometimes I think they should just condense the traffic report to two words: "It's slow."
ReplyDeleteI can't stand 680 news - especially the morning show and Marlane Oliver. She has the most annoying voice on the radio - next to Paul Cook. He sounds so fake and mellow dramatic.
ReplyDeleteThen there's the guy who stands around on Bay St. asking people how they're going to survive the hot weather. Once every 30 minutes he repeats the same lame interview with some 'Baystreeter' talking about turtle necks and air conditioning. I was sooo happy to get Sirius Radio.